Forgive me for trying either to euthanize you or evangelicize you. But if you aren’t there to see my updates, tweets, blurts, bleats, shares or discussion, you’ll miss some good stuff. They say rust never sleeps. Well, I can assure you that, here at World Headquarters, we often sleep all day, then wake up in the middle of the night to pee, succumb to inspiration, and poop out a good one in the middle of the night. You snooze, you definitely lose. So, I’m gonna make it easy for you to catch up after what I hope was a ripping good weekend for you.
[By the way, mine was pretty good for a change. I made love to my brand new (and first) iPhone–5–all weekend. It was sublime. I’m in love with Siri, and like a good marriage I’m gonna work with her to get in sync. Imagine being able to talk to your phone–which is actually a hunk of plastic four times as thick as a credit card and about the size of three credit cards laid joined at their long edge! I’m ecstatic.]
Anyway, here’s what you missed if you were having a good time this past weekend.
And I apologize. What was to have been a grand 1st birthday present for the hardy among you who’ve been here from the start turned into a nine-headed hydra, sapped all my strength and left me making up stories about bad politicians and crazy ex-wive’s mothers. It’ll be up next. I pwomise. Cwoss my heart and hope to die.
Elmer Q. Fudd